I have something special to share with all my fellow hopeless romantics. I had the price lags of interviewing a special young lady by the name of Kimberly Anderson that is having a FAB same sex marriage in New York this year. We did a short QNA about her wedding, how her and her fiancé have made their relationship work over the years, and much much more. I hope you all enjoy learning abount Kim as much as I did! Enjoy, share with friends, and make sure to support gay marriage in your area!

Interview

Tell us a little bit about yourself as well as a little about your honey. Where are you guys from, how long have you been together and how did you meet?

My name is Kimberly and I am an eccentric 25 year old lesbian from the great city of New York. I was born here, I was raised here but I don’t plan on dying here because its too expensive. I have had a few relationships before meeting my fiance Robyn, and truly thought I was in love once or twice before she showed me what love really was. I met my 26 year old fiance over 2 years ago. We half-heartedly gave a relationship a try and failed miserably. We actually ended on very bad terms. The thought of her made me sick to my stomach and if I were to sit here and be honest with you (and myself), it was all a front to cover up the fact that I had fallen in love with her during our whirlwind affair but couldn’t swallow my pride and look for her.

At what point did you realize you were in love with your fiancé and how did you act on your feelings?

Robyn and I actually weren’t on speaking terms for about a year. I received the occasional e-mail and at first I quickly sent them to the trash out of fear that they were going to hurt me until I became brave enough to actually open them. They were genuine and sweet and eloquently written and simply a side of her I didn’t know existed. I would read those emails with my lips parted and my chest heaving with despair. I wanted, needed her in my life again. The final e-mail came to me sometime in May ’12 and I finally responded (I hadn’t responded to any other e-mail). We agreed to meet and she turned out to still be a jerk but all I could think about were the e-mails. “That” Robyn deserves a chance. I could shower “that” Robyn with all of my love. So I agreed to a second meeting. We met on the pier in Brooklyn Bridge Park. The sun was setting, the waves were crashing, the sun was casting his heavenly glow on the glass house of the carousel and as the city line was swallowing the last sip of sun light, she kissed me and I knew I was doomed from that moment. I was utterly in love with her and there was no way I was sharing her with anyone.

 Tell us a little bit about the proposal. How did it happen and was marriage something you two discussed before she proposed to you?

Our actual engagement isn’t one for the books. She proposed to me via text message. I know, not so romantic but wait until I tell you what it said. I don’t remember what it said verbatim but you will get the idea. We were having a particularly rough week sometime in September. Stress from working, stress from family, stress from too much time not being spent together can really take it’s toll. Anyway, I received a text from my honey explaining to me that her feelings are never going to change and she is sure she wants to be with me forever and if I agree, will I marry her tomorrow. My logistical mind rationed 3 thoughts in 3 seconds

1. What am I going to wear?

2. Where are we getting married?

3. Why am I thinking so much?

 And then I said yes!

{Photo: Top- Photo of the boardwalk Kimberly and Lauren will be getting married under. Bottom- Glass Carousel house for ceremony.}

Let’s get into this FAB wedding. What’s your vision for this occasion?

 We didn’t marry the following day because it takes time to get the permit and as time passed, we realized we couldn’t imagine eloping and not displaying all of our lesbian kissing with our friends and family. We are getting married in June in the same place that we had our first kiss (again). The setting will be the same but the way I feel for her has doubled and tripled upon itself. We are having a small intimate wedding (partially because of all of the rules and restraints placed by the city about how many can attend a wedding in a public park). My vision is her. Not the babys-breath in my hair, the flowers in my hand or the family and friends watching. As long as she is waiting for me at the end of that aisle with an open heart and open arms, everything will be fine. Of course I want a beautiful ceremony and an ass-kicking reception but none of that matters if she isn’t there.

Despite the beading and the ruching and the taffeta, I chose a chiffon gown with a train so that I can catch the breeze as I walk down the aisle and look like a goddess.

 Have you turned into a “Bridezilla” at all while planning things?

I don’t think I have been as extreme as the bridezillas depicted on the show but I absolutely have been very testy lately. I don’t think people will truly understand the pressure, anxiety, fear and excitement involved with not only getting married but also planning a wedding yourself. Its been very tough all these months of planning to ensure that your one day meets your standards of perfection.

 Can you give our readers some insight into how you two have managed to make it work thus far and how you plan on continuing to maintain a healthy relationship in the future?

 People say that a relationship is a second job, and that it is hard work. I disagree. If a relationship is meant to be, most of the time it will be as easy as breathing. Loving and respecting your spouse will become second nature. Spend time getting to know one another. Ask questions because it encourages conversation. Everyone feels good when they feel heard and even better when they feel understood. After all this time, I still don’t know every detail about my fiances life but that doesn’t mean I am not hungry for the information. We spend more time in bed having pillow talk than we spend making love. Nothing is wrong with making love but balance it out.

Have the ability to be flexible. People say things like “Take me as I am” and “I’m not changing for anybody” but if your first reaction to bad news or an unsavory comment is to fling a boiling pot of grits at someone, then you can afford to rethink changing. When you love someone enough then you should be willing to at least consider the possibility of changing your behavior. How is your behavior affecting your lover? How does your behavior affect those around you? Does the change make you a better or worse person. Change is scary but change can also be a good thing.

 I know marriage isn’t going to be cake walk but I am excited and happy to be hers. We will keep doing what we are doing to make this marriage successful. Listening with open ears and loving with open hearts, if that makes sense.

Last question. How do you think marriage will change you as a person?

It all goes back to changing and listening. Before I met her, I never listened to anything anyone said. I believed I was perfect and if you didn’t agree, then you were the one that was defective. When you see or hear the love of your life cry because of something you did or said, it causes you to stop, step outside of your little box and evaluate. I have mentally morphed from an 18 year old kid to a 25 year old, responsible, smart, funny and sexy woman in one year. She has opened my eyes and with evaluation and small changes, I grew up. She makes me want to be the best me I could possibly be. I thank her for that.

And Aryka, I thank you for inviting me to your blog to share my story. It isn’t a fairy tale by any means but its my perfect happy ending. I hope all have gained from reading this!