Black History Month Project: Personal Stories From Young Black Americans #5 – The Fab Femme

Black History Month Project: Personal Stories From Young Black Americans #5

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My coming out story is somewhat different. As a kid I was a BIG tomboy… I loved hanging with the guys…and they always talked about girls ….and I talked about girls with them. I would always say that a girl was pretty and all that and I never thought that this was DIFFERENT…It was just who I was. I just loved talking about girls. Growing up I didn’t have any knowledge of what being Lesbian or anything LGBT was… I was just told that homosexuality was wrong…because of what the bible said. My dad was a pastor and always said that no matter what …he loved me. I knew this…

When I got to around 7th grade I started to realize that I had strong feelings towards girls…Most girls say things like “she’s SO pretty…” or “UGH her body is perfect…I wish I had her body…”. For me I realized that I was not only looking but THINKING about their bodies and wanting them to be closer than just a friend to me. Since I was told that being homosexual was a sin I prayed from 7th grade until 9th grade…and hoped that God would take this from me and that I wouldn’t feel this way…

When I got into 9th grade I had a few relationships with guys trying to cover up the fact that I liked girls… I would stay in relationships with boys so that I wouldn’t think about girls…THAT didn’t work… Then I met this girl that I couldn’t even TRY to being to act like I wasn’t attracted to her…I loved everything about her and couldn’t stop looking at her and dreaming about her …We got together on April 4th 2010 …the end of my ninth grade year. She then moved to Texas but we continued our relationship and still are continuing it…

In December of 2010 I went to a conference called Student Diversity Leadership Conference (SDLC) through my school. It was a conference about opening your mind and accepting all different types of people…different races,religions,sexes,sexualities…This really encouraged me to become more involved…out…and open about who I am and what I am…After this three day long…life changing conference…I realized that I couldn’t hold back how I felt anymore. The night I got home I told my mom that I was a lesbian because over the years I realized that I only liked attention from girls. It was hard on her but for me I felt so much more free and happy… I don’t have to hide anything any longer.She cried. And told me that I could become a flaming homosexual…and she would still love me.

My dad told me that he is okay with it…but he would like me to try not to label myself because he feels that labeling yourself is just trying to make yourself feel more comfortable with who you are as a person in the LGBT community…  But hey…all I have to say is that I have heard that it gets better… I believe it and I encourage everyone who is in a tough situation with coming out to people…that it feels better… It may not end up turning out well…but now you are not hiding who you really are… I would also like to say that at my school…everyone knows that I am a lesbian…I am very open about it…. Thank goodness I have friends to be there for me…..

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Aryka Randall is a media mogul in the making from San Diego, California. After relocating to Louisiana in 2004, Randall became active in her local LGBTQ community. Randall was recently featured on Go Magazines annual ‘100 Women We Love‘ issue along with Tagg Magazine, the Dinah Shore Blog, and a number of other LGBT publications for her work in the LGBT community


  • At 2012.02.22 00:44, Rasheeda said:

    I came out in 2010 after SDLC also it really opened my eyes to acceptance and I thought I was the only one who came out after the conference.

    • At 2012.02.27 13:13, Joanna said:

      Of course not!
      I love SDLC

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